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How to Find Time For Yourself as a Single Working Mum

By Amanda Alexander

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Published: 05Nov2009
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It is nothing short of amazing to think how a single mum can balance her time between so many commitments. After all, it can seem very difficult when there are two parents in the household, so how on earth do single mums cope? Answer: They just do! There is such a lot to do in any given day and as a single mum you simply get on with finding ways to achieve it all.

You list of commitments might be never-ending, but there is nothing in the rulebook to say that as a single working mum can't have time for yourself. You might have two full-time jobs, one being dedicated to your career and the other to Family Ltd., but even in these seemingly impossible circumstances, "me time" is essential, not just for your own sanity and wellbeing, but for also for your children's. After all, happy mum equals happy kids!

If you want to find "me time" as a single mum, first of all you must look at your time management. This is not to say that you must "clock-in" and "clock-out" of every task and project, but you must be able to prioritise ruthlessly. If this isn't your forte, try the following exercise: Keep a diary of everything you do for 3-5 days in 15 minute increments. Not easy, but very worthwhile! Once you've done this you'll get a clear picture of where the time "goes" and where you are making the most of your time and where you might be "losing" time. If you want to hone your time management skills and balance your life, you'll find online life coaching experts who can help you to get to grips with all this.

Professional coaching tells us that time management is one of the most important assets in business. Whilst blue-chip companies have always employed advisers and consultants, coaching for women has become increasingly commonplace, especially for single working mums who seek to balance family, career and personal life.

To enable you to find "me time," it will help if you become more efficient at some of the tasks that you perform, day in, day out. Take a look at each area. Sometimes it will not be possible to streamline and become more efficient, but you need to tackle this with a "can do" attitude. Challenge yourself to experiment with new ways of doing things. If you have to work within a tightly constrained budget, this may not allow you to be as efficient as you otherwise could, but nevertheless, analyse everything. For example, are you being as efficient as you could be when it comes to cleaning? Do you absolutely need to repeat a certain process daily or would you be better served by allocating more time for a really thorough cleanup on one day and much less time on some of the others? If you're a manic cleaner, try going on a cleaning diet for a few days and see if the World really does fall apart without the bathroom being cleaned daily!

While no one is advocating that you cut corners or that you don't eat a healthy diet, see if you can make alterations to cut down on the amount of time that you spend preparing or cooking. Introduce fresh vegetables or fruits more often, scoring in terms of diet and less preparation. Take the "cook once eat twice" challenge, looking for recipes that you can double up on and either eat on two days running or freeze. How much time could you save if you cooked only 4 times per week instead of 7 and what could you do with that "cook free" time that you've saved?

Remember that certain things are not optional. You must get an adequate amount of sleep and you can't "buy into" this time, and building exercise into your week is like paying into a health savings account - you'll see "compound" benefits very quickly in your resilience, your health and your self-confidence . Simply by concentrating on exercise routine you can often get more energy, promoting greater efficiency during your working day.

Amanda Alexander is the Director of Coaching Mums. She is a widely renowned ICF-accredited coach, who has helped thousands of working moms across the Globe over the past 7 years to get more time, less guilt, bring balance back into their lives, and have more fun! For truly inspiring articles and cutting-edge professional coaching tips, sign up to receive "Inspire", our highly-acclaimed free newsletter at Coaching Mums

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