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In Loving Memory - Poems of Bereavement

By Anna Williams

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Published: 17Dec2008
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The loss of a loved one is probably the hardest experience that many of us ever go through. It can be a very painful time, and can even be very hard to think.

If you have recently experienced such a loss, its understandable that you might be looking for the right poem to express how you feel about the person you recently lost. It is also understandable that you might yourself be far too mired down in your own grief to think clearly what to say or do.

There are a few important things to remember, when someone has died.

1. When a person dies, that doesn't mean that the person is gone forever, or that the person no longer exists. In fact, it doesn't even mean that you won't see that person again. We are all spiritual beings. When our bodies die, that doesn't mean that we ourselves also die. In fact, no matter what your religion is, I'm sure you can agree that we are spiritual beings and not bodies. This is one belief that all religions have in common.

2. Whether you believe that people go to heaven or hell when they die, or whether you believe that people are born again after they die, the fact remains that they go somewhere. They still exist, they have the same individuality as before, they have thoughts and feelings, and they may even still remember you for a long time to come. But no matter what, remember that there is always a chance you will see them again - whether it be in a future life, or in heaven. (Unless of course you suspect your loved one is going to hell and aren't planning on joining him or her there - but if you are reading this article, the chances that either one of you would be destined in that direction are slim.)

With that said, lets move on to the subject of "In Loving Memory Poems."

Your poem of bereavement can be something which you write yourself, or which is written by a family. These poems can be extremely moving to the rest of your family and friends, when read out at funerals or in other circumstances.

Another option is to find funeral poems which have already been written. Perhaps the most famous is the one entitled "Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep." But there are many others.

If you are going to write your poem of bereavement on your own, in loving memory of your lost friend, family member, or spouse, here are a few basic rules of advice:

1. Try to keep your poem personal and unique. Think about how you feel and try to put that into words.

2. Keep a good rhythm in your poem - it makes it much more moving and powerful. If you can rhyme, do. But regardless, try to make your poem flow.

3. One useful technique for keeping poems rhythmic is what I call "finger counting." This is a simple matter of keeping a regular pattern of syllables and accents in each line. For example, your poem might have the same number of syllables on each line, or it may have a repeating pattern.

For example:

Line 1: 7 syllables

Line 2: 5 syllables

Line 3: 7 syllables

Line 4: 5 syllables

Line 5: 7 syllables

Line 6: 5 syllables

Line 7: 7 syllables

Line 8: 5 syllables

As you can see there is a repeating pattern and rhythm. This is just one example of how it can be done, and you can try any arrangement that works for you. The important thing is to try to keep it rhythmic, with a repeating pattern that changes little. This is what gives poems their musical quality and what makes them so powerful.

I hope this information is helpful to you and I hope you get through this difficult time. Remember, there is one thing that whomever you have lost would probably not want. That person would probably not want you to remain sad and in pain for a long, long time. So - do a good job for the funeral, express your feelings and your admiration for your lost loved-one, and give them an excellent service which you feel they deserve.

Then remember to move on to happier times, create in your life, help others, and have a great future.

Anna Williams has been writing poetry since the age of four. You can find poems of bereavement and poems for funerals at her website, In Loving Memory Poems.

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