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Author: Dr Jeanne King PhD

Abusive Relationship Healing - 7 Secrets for Greater Well-being after an Abusive Relationship

Adversity is part of life. It comes in all shapes and sizes. It's not what happens to you; it's what you do about it that matters most.

Battered women also come in all shapes and sizes. And I'm convinced that what they choose to do with their circumstances, after the fact, is far more important to the bigger picture of their lives than anything else.

Here are some things that will increase your well-being after an abusive relationship.

1) Keep yourself in a place of pure positive energy

Certain things we do and think elevate our feelings, our energy state. That is the state at which we vibrate. Please now take a deep cleansing breath and come with me out of the boxing ring of the social legal crime back to your mind, body and soul. Find those activities that elevate your mood and make them a routine activity.

2) Do what you love and the money will follow

While it is true that the financial issues of leaving an abusive relationship are often overwhelming, they're not insurmountable. Do what is necessary to keep you and your children, (if they are in the picture) comfortable with the basic life essentials. And with whatever time and energy you have left, do what you love. The more you do it, the more time you will have to do it. Over time, "the what you love" can become your primary source of sustenance.

3) Let inner peace be your top priority

If inner peace is your primary priority, then your battles are ultimately over. Why? It takes two to tango. And if you have chosen peace, there is less war. Now don't take this to mean that you'll never be attacked or assaulted by another, as you don't control that. More importantly, I bring your attention to two points: a) you have a choice and b) peace can be yours.

4) Choose to be calm and centered over being right

My comment above, leads right to this one. It's not about being "right"...it's about maintaining your inner "rightness." Let's face it, you didn't like it when your whole life was about his/her being right and you being on the other end of that, did you? So rather than change sides simply because you may be able to, or think you "should" (as you have learned that is how those in power do it), choose to be calm and centered over being right.

5) Know that whatever has happened in your life, happened to serve you and those you serve

There are truly no coincidences. Rather than holding on to the misfortune of "it," look to the possibilities remaining. As you do, you will see how that which happened to you serves you—in spite of its inherent sacrifices—and ultimately can be put to the benefit of serving others. If you know of my story, you know I'm living proof of this.

6) Make peace with the universe

When we are battered we become conditioned to believe that we are easily taken advantage of, or people simply take advantage of you. Not so! The larger fabric of life is inter-universal-support. Let this become the wallpaper of yours.

7) Indulge in that which gives you a natural high

I think if you do this, all the other things mentioned will find you. And from here, you will increase your well-being following an abusive relationship.

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