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A Philadelphia Life Coach Shares a Secret for Increased Personal Confidence and Self Esteem

By Jeannette Samanen PhD

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Published: 24Oct2008
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You have within yourself a resource you can draw on to find inner guidance and discover unsuspected personal strength. You can connect with this inner wisdom by relaxing deeply and inviting an image to appear. What you receive will enable you to successfully address the challenges you face, improving self esteem and building personal confidence easily perceived by those around you.

Here is how my life coaching clients have benefited from this method:

- The perspective Paul gained when the Sun told him "I will rise tomorrow without your help" enabled him to delegate more, improving his productivity, the morale of his group, and his personal confidence.

- Overwhelmed with too much to do, Jody learned to focus from an Owl who took her flying above a meadow full of rabbits, chipmunks, and mice. "If I stay up here, wondering which animal to choose, I will starve," explained Owl. "I must select one and strike or I will go hungry." With that, Owl shot down to the ground, snatched a shrew in his talons and flew off to his nest. Jody remembered the image of Owl whenever she felt confused by the many options available to her. She selected one task and focused her attention on that project alone. She accomplished more with greater ease which boosted her self-esteem.

- Ken developed personal confidence and calm in the face of adversity after a massive Oak showed him how to remain firmly rooted through the fierce winds of a storm.

Here is the simple procedure you, too, can use to successfully achieve your goals, improve confidence and build self esteem:

1. Focus and Formulate a Question

Create a space and time when you know you will be undisturbed. Spend a few moments concentrating on the issue you are facing. Review in your mind the challenges as well as your goals.

Then formulate a question you can pose to your inner knowing. Make sure your question focuses on the solution, not the problem. Questions such as "What is wrong with me?" or "Why can't I do this?" focus on your problems and limitations. Questions like "What do I need to know to move beyond this impasse?" or "What am I not seeing here that will help me achieve my goal?" elicit solutions and resources you can use to move forward.

Broad questions work better than yes/no questions such as "Should I leave my job?" My favorite question is, "What do I need to know about... (supply the issue you are facing)...for my learning and personal growth at this time?"

2. Relax

A sense of deep relaxation provides the opening through which you can access your inner wisdom. Make sure your body is comfortably supported. Uncross your arms and legs.

Breathe deeply, imagining that you are breathing in calm and peace. As you exhale, imagine yourself releasing any stress or tension. If you notice distracting thoughts, let them go on the next exhalation and turn your focus back to your breathing. The more deeply you relax, the easier it will be for you to connect with your inner wisdom.

3. Ask and wait patiently

Once your mind is still and you are feeling deeply relaxed, pose your question, or call out and invite an image to be present. Then simply wait receptively for whatever comes to you.

You may immediately receive an image or an answer to you question that provides you with exactly the insight you are seeking. Or you may need to wait patiently for something to come.

It is important to allow plenty of time for your inner wisdom to respond. If a response does not come instantly, avoid the temptation to jump in and come up with an answer yourself. Allow your inner wisdom all the time it needs.

If nothing comes to you, your "Inner Critic" may be standing between you and your inner knowing. This is the voice in your head that says things like "You'll never be able to do this!" or "This is stupid!"

If judgmental thoughts such as these intrude let them go and return your focus to your breathing. If these thoughts persist, thank them for being there but affirm your commitment to learning what your inner wisdom has to tell you.

If you remain consistent in this commitment, trust the process, and allow time for these skills to develop, you will soon succeed in dependably accessing your inner wisdom. Then you will regularly experience the rewards of Step 4.

4. Receive

Remain alert and open to any awareness that comes to you. Inner wisdom may come to you as a phrase or a simple knowing or may present itself in the form of an image.

What you receive may feel so apparent that at first you may wonder whether it is coming from your inner knowing or if you've simply thought it up. Don't be concerned about this. What's important is that you find it useful.

If an image appears, welcome it. Dialog with whatever comes to you. Express any feelings and ask any questions you have, remaining open to the response you receive.

5. Refine

Whatever you receive may provide exactly what you are seeking and nothing more needs to be said or done. If you have questions or even objections to what you have received, simply express them, just as you would to a trusted advisor. Then be open to whatever your inner wisdom offers in response. Continue this dialog until you feel satisfied.

If there are additional aspects of the situation you would like to explore, cycle back through Steps 1-5 until you feel resolved.

In Summary

What you receive from your inner wisdom may seem no different from what friends have told you or what a life coach might say. You will find, however, that because this awareness comes from within yourself it carries a power and sense of personal truth which make the message more impactful and transformative.

Learning which comes from within, rather than through someone else's advice, empowers you to more effectively create sustainable change in your life.

You will learn that everything you need in order to achieve any goal can be found within yourself. This awareness alone helps improve self esteem. Accessing your inner wisdom will help you succeed, which will build confidence even more.

Drawing on skills and expertise developed over 30 years experience, Philadelphia life coach Jeannette Samanen PhD provides effective life coaching, empowering you to achieve your goals. You will receive "5 Easy Steps to Access Your Inner Wisdom" , an expanded version of this article, when you subscribe to her "Make Your Good Life Better" newsletter at www.achieveyourgoals.com.

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