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Adults with ADD: Are You Trying To Take on Too Much at Once?

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Published: 06Mar2009
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Are You Trying To Take on Too Much at Once?

Lately it seems that many of my clients are struggling with a form of Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) impulsiveness that we're all familiar with: wanting to make a positive change in life, and expecting it to happen instantly.

As a result, I'm seeing people who are taking on too much at once, and then getting down on themselves for not being able to continue the actions and sustain the results. In a sense, they are setting themselves up to fail.

Maybe you have--or currently are--experiencing something similar?

Adults with ADD run into this problem all the time, in lots of situations. It's the nature of ADD: new ideas and goals seem fun and interesting, so you jump into one head first, only to find that your interest wanes and the goal gets abandoned. Bad feelings usually follow.

The problem isn't the goal, however, and it isn't you, either! It's more likely that you're just trying to take on too much at once.

One of the hardest things for an adult with ADD to learn is that change takes time. We decide on a change that we want to make, and then expect that the decision alone will ensure success. Unfortunately, this just isn't true.

Real change doesn't happen quickly. It happens piece by piece, and it comes in levels of success. If you try to rush the process, overwhelm can easily set in, at which point it just becomes too difficult to stick to your plans. Some common experiences among adults with ADD include:

Trying to adopt a healthy lifestyle, only to find yourself back on the couch a few days later, overindulging in pizza and ice cream.

Becoming so engaged in a new hobby that you enjoy it every day for hours at a time, only to forget all about it in a week.

Cleaning out a closet to near perfection, only to find yourself throwing stuff in there and messing it up again just a few days later.

When this happens, you end up feeling bad about yourself, and asking questions like "What is wrong with me? Why can't I just get it together?"

The answer is simple: there is nothing wrong with you! You just tried to take on too much at once.

Change is much more sustainable when you adopt it piece by piece. So instead of jumping in head first, you take a more balanced approach:

You focus on drinking more water during the day. And when that is no longer a challenge, you work on making exercise a regular habit.

When you become interested in a new hobby, you sign up for a weekly class to ensure that you stick with it.

You first clear the clutter out of your closet. Then you create organizational systems. Then you create structure to ensure follow-through.

This slow-and-steady-wins-the-race approach is an unfamiliar concept for many adults with ADD. But it works!

The key is to identify layers (or steps) of the main goal that you can apply one at a time. You work on achieving a small success, and then build on it with another small success when you're ready.

Jennifer Koretsky is the Founder of the ADD Management Group, LLC, author of Odd One Out: The Maverick's Guide to Adult ADD, and Co-Founder of the Virtual AD/HD Conference. Jennifer and her team work with ADD adults who are overwhelmed with everyday life in order to help them simplify, focus, and succeed. To learn more, visit http://www.ADDmanagement.com .

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