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Have you ever noticed how quickly toddlers learn new words, skills, and concepts? Why, they're like little sponges eagerly soaking up everything in sight - even fleeting observations and seemingly forgettable experiences! And what parent hasn't been pleasantly surprised to discover that their little ones imitated their behaviors or repeated their words (unless of course, it's the unfortunate cuss word or bad habit) before they were aware that their children even noticed them!
But have you ever wondered why this happens so often? Well, according to experts, children have deep and abiding desires to become more and more independent. To that end, they actively seek to uncover, learn, and ultimately master new skills. What's more, toddlers whose learning endeavors are supported in a nurturing environment and whose accomplishments are acknowledged and celebrated, are far more likely to pick up new information and skills faster and more completely than children who are ignored or otherwise discouraged - passively or overtly - from doing so.
These assertions surely aren't epiphanies or "AHAs!" for most of you. Rather, they're just plain common sense. After all, it's completely logical to assume that the vast majority of us - adults and children alike - are more likely to learn quickly when our efforts are supported and our achievements are noticed and rewarded.
And so it goes with potty training... I can't tell you the number of times I've worked with parents who indicate that their goals are to potty train their toddlers quickly (i.e. in 24 to 48 hours) yet, set themselves up for failure by discounting this hard-earned advice! Do they do so intentionally? Absolutely not. In fact, most are extremely well meaning and loving people who unfortunately, believe that common potty training myths are true. As a result, potty training their child takes much, much longer than it should - often several months or more - and they're left wondering what went wrong.
Many learn the hard way, but you don't have to... that is, if you truly believe that children - even yours - want to be potty trained as quickly as possible and they need your encouragement, support, and know-how to make it happen. But that's not all... You must be armed with a solid and time-tested plan - one that uses behavioral modification techniques in a nurturing environment - and follow it carefully.
There are many fast-forward methods out there; in my opinion, a few are excellent, some are good, and sadly, many are just plain awful. So, please choose carefully. If not, you'll waste a great deal of time and money - and might even unknowingly sabotage your child's progress.
Following are my four best tips for potty training fast. Use them as guidelines for deciding on the method you'll use.
1. Believe in your heart-of-hearts that it can be accomplished. I have personally potty trained many toddlers in 24 -48 hours. And no two were exactly alike and ALL had "challenges" of one kind or another. Some could speak the King's English; others could only understand simple commands. Some were extremely cooperative, and others were stubborn as mules. Some had never seen a potty before and others had already decided they didn't want any part of the whole thing. Some were 17 month-old boys and others were 24 month-old-girls.
Hopefully, you get the idea... the point is, as they say, "I've seen it all," and, in my experience, there are only two reasons why excellent "fast-forward" potty training methods don't work. They are:
* The child was not physically and/or developmentally ready (See #2 below)
* The "teacher" (usually a parent) did not follow directions carefully and completely. For example, they didn't prepare properly, lost focus, and/or lacked consistency and follow-through.
2. Make sure that your child is ready for potty training - physically and developmentally. Although there is no specific age that is right for all toddlers, The American Academy of Pediatrics concluded that the vast majority of children can be potty trained between the ages of 18 and 27 months.
Use this as a guideline but remember, that experts across the board agree that developmental signals are far better indicators of potty training readiness than chronological age (e.g. dressing and undressing themselves; imitating others; frequent "I can do it all by myself!" declarations, and the like). If you're still uncertain, check with your pediatrician or take one of the potty training readiness assessments on the Internet.
3. Do your homework. Don't settle for the first one you find. Rather, give this important rite-of-passage the attention it deserves. (Believe me, you'll be happy you did!) Forget the hype and choose a trustworthy, time-tested accelerated potty training system that is supported in practice and theory by pediatricians, child therapists, and other respected experts. Here are some additional guidelines for helping you choose an effective - and quick - method.
It should:
* Offer details on how to determine if your child is ready
* Provide comprehensive, soup-to-nuts instructions (from the planning stage through implementation) using easy-to-understand language and formatting
* Combine positive behavioral modification techniques in a happy and nurturing surroundings
* Require that one teacher (usually a parent) commit his or her full attention to the process until completed
* Discourage any form of punishment for accidents or non-compliance or excessive "pushing"
* Include a detailed list of supplies needed - and this list should not be extensive or encourage you to purchase "fancy" or expensive equipment, toys, books, etc.
* Disallow the use of pull-ups (which are guaranteed to slow you down!)
4. Set aside the time (24-48 hours) needed; devote your full attention to the process; and no matter what happens - stay with the program and remain consistent. Simply put, the best prepared and most tenacious parents win this one - loosey-goosey just won't cut it if you want to potty train your child quickly. If you're not ready to put aside a full two days to the process, this is not for you. If that's your style and you're determined to approach it this way, it's best to hunker down and be prepared for the long haul.
But let me clarify one last point - Although I specifically suggest that you set aside two full days, many children learn in 24 hours or less (no joke). However, even if they do, I like the idea of adding a "no pressure" extra day to reinforce things and let toddlers begin to master their new skill before jumping back into "real life." Also - and trust me on this one - lots of kids finally "get it" right before they go to bed on the first day, and it's wonderful to have an extra day to repeat, repeat, and repeat some more!
I hope this advice has proven helpful to those of you who have already decided to - or are considering - potty training your toddler fast. Remember, it can be accomplished quickly, joyfully, and completely with a little bit of planning, the right mindset and a whole lot of love!
Mary E. Eule, BA, MS is a professional writer and researcher who has spent the last three decades helping parents potty train their children quickly and joyfully. She is the developer of the BRIEFS potty training system and author of the e-book, "The Official BRIEFS Potty Training Guide." Visit her website: http://www.AskThePottyTrainer.com to purchase her e-book, download her free potty e-course or to get more free tips for potty training fast.
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